Thursday, December 11, 2008

President Bush

Hello Mr. President Bush. I, and all of the state of Michigan, have always said that you are an incredibly handsome, powerful, and intelligent man. Sure, we voted for Gore, Kerry, and Obama, but that does not mean that we, in any way, were not able to perceive just how handsome, powerful, and wise you are. People have given you crap through the years for so many things, and I just wish there was some way that I could take the pain that you are feeling from these mean insults away from you. If only people could understand the real you - as we do in Michigan. As you move out of your current home and start to take in the rest of the United States, may I suggest you come and spend some time in the beautiful state of Michigan. I will purchase you an omelette and, if we're both lucky, I'll have finished BurgerFest-O-Rama and can take you to consume the champion burger. I'm sure that is something a handsome, powerful, and intelligent man would enjoy.

Also, if you could loan us $14B as soon as possible from the pre-existing TARP plan that would be just swell. How lucky we are to have such a benevolent, concise, funny, and clear-minded President.

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