Saturday, April 26, 2014

Alright, Let's Try This

Today, my sister posted something on Facebook which reminded me of something I wrote years ago on this universally under-appreciated blog.  This caused me to go back and find this post, which in turn caused me to start to re-read many of my old posts, which in turn caused me to laugh heartily at my generally amazing loquaciousness.  It was a great pleasure writing almost daily because I really felt that everyone deserved to experience all sides of me.

I think we all deserve a loud and proud CONGRATULATIONS for that period - me, for being so excellent, and you, for deciding to enhance your life by reading about me.

Now that we've all agreed upon this, let's also take a moment to acknowledge that not writing anything in a little over three years is not excellent overall performance - if you measure performance by any of the possible metrics on which one may measure such a thing.  As Adele Dazeem says, "the past is in the past."  You can't say I didn't warn you...

So then what's happened in the past three years?  Man, I ate so much ice cream.  So, so much ice cream.

Before we had Dean, I always felt relatively occupied.  I had a busy job, a newish wife, I had just spent every free moment fixing and updating the house we now live in, ice cream to eat, and most likely some other stuff that kept me busy.  Having just one (just ONE) child redefined my concept of free time, and in truth, all I ever wanted to do was not to do anything if I ever had the opportunity to not do anything.  And this is why I haven't written Jiminy Cricket in 3+ years.

What else is sister moved back to Michigan from Minnesota and now has three children, my brother moved back to Michigan from California, my lovely wife Maureen has (1) not divorced me and (2) is pregnant with our second child, my sister-in-law has 2 sons, my parents participate in dog competitions every weekend and compete nationally, my softball team has won two or three league championships, my volleyball team has won one, Breaking Bad, Fringe, and The Office are done, and a million other things.  It has been a batshit crazy 3 years.  Why are bats known for their combined shitting and craziness?  I've done a little Googling and the answer is unclear.  Was Google invented between April 2011 and now?  It's amazing!  I can write words into a box and then it attempts to give me answers to my words.  Batshit crazy!

With another child on the horizon in early June, it seems likely that I will be amazingly successful at failing to take a new run at writing.  I anticipate my desired use of free time again morphing to reflect something akin to a catatonic state.  Who knows?  I don't know much, but I know I love you, and that may be, all I need to know.

Well I do know this - we've pretty much entirely fixed the state of Michigan through positive thinking and jokes. However, pretty much entirely is not entirely the same thing as entirely, so maybe, just maybe, there can be a little time for this avocation.  Or maybe not.  Who do I look like, Angie Dickinson?