Grant Me Peace and Closing

I've been having a fair amount of trouble with "the man" recently. First it was the whole internet/cable saga with LandArc property management and Bright House Networks. Just as a follow up to that bit (you demand completeness in your narratives, I appreciate that), someone did something that gave us cable and internet, but that's all I can specifically say about that. Things are working and we'll leave the solution as MAGIC - for now. More details might be available after we're free from our current living situation under the oversight of the local homeowner's association. On the issue of the HOA, I would like to again emphasize that you never should live in a condo when possible. January 5th our internet went down, and after all the detail of my past posts, our landlady received word on January 22nd that the HOA would consider our request for a temporary cable line in the next 5-30 days. If not for the current MAGIC setup, I would not be able to perform my job for at least 22 days and possibly up to 47 days thanks to the fine work of LandArc and the HOA. 47 days would only hold as an outer limit if they actually review the request within the stated time line and if they did approve the request when they got around to reviewing it. I hate them so much it makes my butt pucker.

This and a few other things have driven us to the crazy point of actually purchasing a home in Northville. Yup, we're putting our money where my mouthwords are and planting even firmer roots in the state. This is fun and exciting and our first home purchase, and even better, we'll soon be far away from a property management company. We're buying a regular person-owned home, not a short sale, just like people used to do it in the 50s.

I get that lenders are super crazy anal about doling out mortgages after the credit crisis and housing meltdown and the recent alien invasion, but our lender is being downright weird.

I owe somebody 10 dollars. In my right pocket, I have 50 dollars, and in my left pocket, I have 5 dollars (3 of which I can't account for). To get to 10 dollars in my left pocket, I have to transfer 5 more dollars from my right pocket to my left pocket. I leave a clear paper trail indicating the withdrawal and deposit of this five dollars, and I can also clearly show that I have 45 dollars remaining in my right pocket. However, the seller is freaked out because of the 3 dollars I can't account for that were originally and remain in my left pocket. A sane person would say "hey, you still have 45 dollars in your right pocket so this will be no problem", but an insane person would ask you to give them a photograph of every penny that makes up that mystery 3 dollars. This is the situation with which I have been wasting far too much of my time for the last week+.

For the most part, things seem to be moving along despite some of these odd hiccups. I just want to be a proud Michigan homeowner so that I can't start losing my 15% per year on my property like the rest of the good people of Michigan. And get as far away from LandArc as possible, as soon as possible. This alone is worth the thousands in almost guaranteed investment loss.