Thursday, April 15, 2010

News But Then Not

We are within 15 days of the happiest day of my life minus all the other days that were way happier for far better reasons. 15 days from now, you will not be able to smoke and eat breakfast, lunch, or dinner in any of the Michigan restaurants in which I will be eating breakfast, lunch, or dinner. If this is disappointing to you - haha you suck!

I think we're something like the 38th state to finally achieve such a ban, but this makes sense because Michigan people like to bowl, join unions, and kill deer. I'm not stereotyping, I'm just saying that most of the people who I know who like to bowl, join unions, and kill deer also have a thing for inhaling carcinogens in the form of a smoke stick. I will never know the joy of bearing my own child internally, but I have had an internal ticking clock in the form of "WHY HAVEN'T WE BANNED SMOKING YET?" We're only 15 days away.

Earlier today, Oakland County Executive L. Brooks Patterson made news when he said that he was going to sue to stop the ban. Without being a lawyer, his argument against the ban was just about the dumbest (and potentially most frustrating) thing I have ever heard. He said that because the law was passed without funding, he would not be able to pay the necessary resources to enforce this ban in Oakland County. That is [expletive deleted] crazy. When a law is passed in the state that promotes individual health and well-being, additional funding doesn't have to be allocated to support any such law. Do I have to pay separately (out of my taxes) to be defended from murder, manslaughter (they are different you know, watch Law & Order), extortion, assault, aggravated assault, dangerous drivers, jaywalking, counterfeit, and on and on? Absolutely [expletive deleted] not. That would be [expletive deleted] insane. A law is passed, and the good police people who protect the state citizens and the well-being of these citizens are then charged with enforcing this law.

After publicly declaring something so idiotic, L. Brooks Patterson said he received over 100 phone calls and emails within one hour of people kindly asking him to stop being such an idiot. Surprisingly, it worked! Patterson withdrew his lawsuit, and he will let the law come into effect. He does claim that the law will likely be largely/entirely enforced by bar and restaurant owners and their patrons so he still thinks it will be ineffective, but he better know he's [expletive deleted] right that I will shut down any smoking in my vicinity. Unless the person smoking is bigger or scarier than me.

*To enhance your pleasure of the post, every expletive deleted is the F-word (with "ing")


Pam said...

>>> When a law is passed in the state ... additional funding doesn't have to be allocated to support any such law.

Yes, actually it does. It's in the Michigan Constitution. The Headlee Amendment states: Section 29 prohibits the state from mandating that local governments provide new services unless the state reimburses the locals for any necessary increased costs they may incur.

Ken said...

Good citation, but I'm not convinced it is pertinent. A service, by most definitions, includes things like trash pickup. If we have a legal code and we have a service (the police) that supports this legal code, if the legal code is amended, does the support of this amended code constitute a new service? I believe it does not.

Dan Anderson said...

been waitin' a long time as well for this